A New Sense Of Belonging

Posted on Mon Aug 3rd, 2026 @ 10:51pm by Ensign T'Shai & Ensign Blaine McCray

2,011 words; about a 10 minute read

Mission: ARYL 1X04: All the Friends We Can Get
Location: Blaine’s/T’Shai’s Quarters

The first and most awkward moments were over, the time for the immediate rejection of their long-awaited rejoining was past and the discomfort of potential rej- No. T’Shai reminded herself, the fear she’d had of him turning her away and renouncing the betrothal from ages past was now gone. As a child, she had been inquisitive, asking more questions than most of her contemporaries. Her father, Oshik, had made the formal inquiries to other families in preparation for her betrothal, but those had been dismissed after meeting the six year old T’Shai and her constant queries. When Solak had come asking about her availability, her father had carefully thought about the situation and didn’t immediately say yes, but that had only been for show. He’d confessed this to her when she was twelve and beginning her focused studies and preparation for the Vulcan Science Academy. So for the past decade, part of her had been wondering if this had been a mistake, a forced-together amalgamation of two ‘unwanteds’.

Still, she’d been a dutiful daughter and accepted it, though she’d hidden her inquisitiveness under the mask of logic and dispassion ever since. Until it came time for her doctorate, which had veered away from her area of study that it had nearly been turned away for that alone. Now she sat on the couch next to Blaine, her hand in his and again her pulse accelerated, for no reason. “It would be logical for us to get to know one another better.” She stated, not what she truly desired to say, but how could she take that big a leap of faith yet? “I have been studying astrophysics and stellar anomalies primarily, gravitational effects as a secondary area of study. I am a year behind my peers, however I am of the belief that I am still more advanced in the application of my knowledge.”

Blaine sat on the couch with her, his mind lost on the road that had led him here as the warmth of her hand soaked into him. Solok had told him, much later over a mug of fal’kir tea, how hard it had been to arrange a match for him. Everyone knew the story of the half-breed son of the promising scientist who had foregone a prestigious assignment at the VSA to explore the stars on a human vessel and had taken a human mate and died because of it. Then Solok had heard of the inquisitive young girl and made it a point to meet her family. Upon getting to know them, he realized just how inquisitive she was.

Blaine grinned at her. “Our science department an’ Navigation are goin’ to love havin’ you here,” he said. “An’ just looking’ in your eyes, I can see how driven you are. What interests do you have outside of your studies? What do you enjoy doin’?”

"I..." The look in T'Shai's eyes went distant, "There wasn't much time for hobbies at the Academy. I took up knitting because I could do that while studying, but aside from the occasional game of Kal'toh and T'Vehlan, it was all work, study and research. I did try some card games with the standard human deck of playing cards, but without others, it was mostly theoretical."

Blaine nodded at that, sweeping a lock of hair behind her ear. “I think I understand. I was a book worm at the Academy too, if I wasn’t in the simulators, I was in the library. That said, you’re in luck. My human grandparents taught me how to play bridge, poker, an’ blackjack. So if you ever want to apply that theoretical knowledge, we can do that. An’ of course, if I can foster any hobbies you’d like to try, I’m happy to.”

"I would enjoy that very much." T'Shai blushed a pink as he cleared the hair, taking his hand now in both of hers, "I believe I'm going to have more free time than I will know what to do with, at least in comparison to before. I would be willing to try just about anything, especially if it's with you. I have been told that I do have one good poker face." She smiled with humor as she made the joke.

“More free time is a good thing,” Blaine said, smiling at her as he thought. “It’ll give us time to know each other, and I’m very much lookin’ forward to learnin’ everythin’ I can about you an’ your poker face.” He thought for a moment. “We might want to send a message to your parents an’ let ‘em know you’re here safe.”

“They are unaware than I will not be joining Amerand yet, I did not have the heart to tell them.” She glanced away uncomfortably, “Father used what contacts he had to arrange for my assignment to that ship, as it is conducting research in mostly human territories, since I had expressed an interest in the subject. I believe he would be disappointed in me for being removed from it.” She looked back up at Blaine, “I will send a message in a few days after I get used tot he routine here, tell them that I’m serving under Captain T’Kal and that you are here as well. They will be pleased with that, in any case, to hear that we are still intending to marry.”

“I can understand your reticence. We’ll let them know when you’re ready,” Blaine said, shaking his head. “But I’ll tell you this, we face everythin’ together.”

"When you say that, you mean it." T'Shai said directly, turning on the couch to face him, tucking a leg underneath her to do it, a quizzical look crossing her face as she looked at him, "Which is good to hear and which I fully agree with. But do you love me, Blaine? I know there's much to learn about each other, but sometimes we know from an early time, but there are many variables." She was clearly fighting with herself for control, "Or am I asking too soon?"

Blaine smiled, watching her for a moment as he thought about her question. “I love the inquisitive girl I got to spend a day with on the square in ShirKahr. I love the piece of you that you left in my mind, that I’ve lived with for three quarters of my life.” He leaned forward a bit, his green eyes on hers. “I want to learn absolutely everythin’ about the woman she turned into, an’ I’m fallin’ in love with her as we speak.”

"There is an old saying from Earth, that curiosity killed the cat." T'Shai watched him come in closer, now only several inches away, "Despite the ending of that saying, when it was brought up in one of the courses we had on humanity, my instructor informed us all that it was a good thing that humanity was curious, because no Vulcan would ever take a risk that did not have at least the maximized odds of success." She drifted closer to him fractionally, "I find that statement illogical, because every great discovery in history comes from a taking a chance and knowing there is the opportunity for failure."

“Yes it does. Like us. You took a huge risk coming out here but I think it’s going to succeed,” he said, kissing her cheek. “At least, it’ll succeed if I have any input.”

"And there's one more risk I would take." T'Shai turned her head and kissed him full on, no chaste kiss like before. This was a test, in part, to get his reaction. Not just humans could be impulsive.

Blaine returned the kiss, letting it flow around and through him. It was a completely new sensation, one he hadn’t been ready for, especially with the mental component of Vulcan touch. When it broke, he inhaled deeply and looked into her eyes. “I can’t imagine a better first kiss.”

‘I am a heretic.’ T’Shai told herself mentally, as she fought to control her emotions once more. No, she wasn’t a slave to them, but the euphoria when she allowed herself to let them off the leash was addicting. Like now. Balance was needed, balance was crucial, but she just needed… “Neither could I.” She managed, a quaver in her voice. “Though maybe I shouldn’t have done that.”

“It was very intense,” he whispered, resting his forehead against hers as he tried to bring his breath back into control, the word ‘heretic’ echoing through his mind. “Gave us a taste of life after marriage, I think. I don’t think you’re a heretic though. Most heretics don’t worry about bein’ heretical.”

Her eyes widened at his use of the word heretic and her head withdrew sharply along with her breath. Of course he'd heard her, she'd been touching him and... He knew. "I allowed my emotions to control myself and my actions. That is the definition of a heretic on Vulcan. I cannot let them know, I cannot allow Captain T'Kal to find out or else she will return me for rehabilitation."

“You were a woman responding to her bonded mate,” he whispered, cupping her chin and looking into her eyes. “That’s natural. I don’t know how your parents prepared you for this, but Solok and I had a late night private conversation out in the Forge one night on a camping’ trip. He told me, an’ this is a direct quote, ‘The emotions of love with a mate are not private because of shame, but because they are sacred to the couple’. What you an’ I share is only for us, T’hy’la.”

"Tasik and V'bai prepared me as well as they could, but that was not what I was referring to. Yes, the emotions of love are permissible to feel and to act upon, however those are not what I referred to. There is much about me you do not know, that you should not know." She tried to explain as dismissively as possible, "Lest it put you in a suboptimal situation when... If my heresy is determined. It is not so simple."

Blaine shook his head, never losing eye contact. “I figure you’ll tell me if you’re ever ready. That said, I still don’t think you’re a heretic. No matter what, I’m with you.”

"Then we will have to determine sleeping arrangements." T'Shai threw caution to the wind and threw her arms around him and hugged him tightly, "If it is not acceptable to sleep in the same bed, I can take the couch here, that way you are assured of getting enough rest. I can sleep anywhere."

“These are just as much your quarters as they are mine,” Blaine said, hugging her. He was already getting used to having her in his arms. “We’ll try sleeping in the same bed first, if you want. I know that’s tradition. But if someone sleeps on the couch, it’ll be me, deal?”

"No." She objected, "These quarters were assigned to you, if need be, I will go to Captain T'Kal and request others. I do not believe it will be necessary, however." She placed her head on his chest, "But I shall take the outside of the bed, that way you cannot escape without waking me up."

Blaine chuckled and shook his head as he felt her settle close. He found himself running his fingers through her ponytail as he thought about what she was saying. “Technically, when I sent that message to Senior Chief Summers, these became your quarters as well. That said, I think we can make these quarters work.” He lifted her chin and looked into her eyes again. “An’ what makes you think I’ll want to escape? I’m right where I want to be.”

 

RSS Feed